Monday, October 19, 2015

Nuggets

Bits and Pieces.
One-liners.
Portions.
Parts.
Chunks.

That's the way God speaks to me. And, that's the way I put my thoughts out there ... in disjointed chunks.

Inside this book that sits next to my bed is lots of disjointed nuggets, along with all kinds of books I plan on reading.

There's something you should know about me that I have never admitted here. Actually, I don't admit it in general EVER.

I'm pretty sure I have a little of that ADD. And, I'm not saying this in a kidding way the way most people refer to it. I'm telling you for real.

Have I been clinically diagnosed? No. But, having been an educator and being able to recognize most of the symptoms of ADD and ADHD, I can safely say that I exhibit quite a bit of the characteristics.

Now, let me say this ... it's not so bad that it's annoying. I mean, I don't think so. Maybe others do, but most people seem to like me to my face. You know  those people who have ADD and you can't get them to focus on one thing for two minutes nor get them to not go off on some random tangent? It's not that bad. I can control it. But, at times, it's not easy to control.

I'm pretty sure this is why I could not sit still nor enjoy Les Miserable'. I love singing but DEAR LORD ... not THAT much singing. OVER TWO HOURS of constant sing-song is not necessary. Nor do I enjoy singing about everyday life activities like having a cup of tea or walking down the street. No. 

Meanwhile, everyone else in the theatre (besides my girlfriend who was giggling along with me throughout it) is crying and being so moved by the emotion of the picture, but I just wanted to get up and get some SnoCaps or even escape to the bathroom for a break.

Now, I know there are probably those who can relate to my distress during Les Mis, but it goes deeper than this.

One of the things I struggle with is staying focused while reading. Yep. I know. Most of you cannot imagine me anyone other than a scholar. Sorry to disappoint.

I am a slow reader ... not slow as in I can't read the words, but slow as in ... I have to reread sentences over and over again because I lose my place or didn't comprehend a thing I just read. It takes me quite a while to finish a book because of all my rereading. Once I put the book down, I've not remembered much about what I have read. This is why I have to take notes in the book to remember and remind myself. This is also why I have only read three of the ten books I brought to Houston.

Besides that, reading while other things are going on ... forget about it. Noises and activity around me are too distracting. Then, I tend to daydream if I do lose my place. 

I know this about myself so I have to make conscious efforts to read in the environment that is conducive to my comprehension.

This is why I make sure my Bible reading is when none of my family are awake or even hanging around to distract me.

The funny thing is that God speaks to me in snippets. He knows me so well. The smallest verse or shortest readings stand out to me the most. Sometimes it's just one word and I have a new revelation. I mean I did preach an entire sermon on the word "but." Probably my favorite one of all time.

Yesterday, Beau asked me what I was writing.
My answer: "Just a little som'in-som'in God gave me."

I explained that God drops little nuggets into my heart and mind throughout the day. He speaks in nuggets and I hear in nuggets. I write in nuggets.

I have always thought about how simple the things that I hear and write are. Since before our journey with our sweet La Petite Belle, people have always encouraged me to write a book. My immediate response has always been that I have nothing to say.

Because of my lack of ability to concentrate on one thing for such a long period, an entire book is too overwhelming for me. Brain overload for sure. Plus, why buy the book when you can read it for free online, right?

However, for the last few weeks, Beau and I have really started contemplating this idea because this experience has taught us so much that we would love to document. We're still thinking about it. Not sure if it will happen or not and that's okay if it doesn't.

Our brains remain full ... overwhelmed with all kinds of nuggets, some beneficial and some not-so beneficial.

One thing's for sure, it would take a LOT of nuggets to fill up a book. And, a lot of time to weave the nuggets together. We're not sure if we're up to the challenge because we are so mentally and emotionally exhausted.

And yet ...............................

This post was supposed to be about a nugget God had given me about encouraging yourself in the Lord and not relying on others to do it for you. 

Well, shoot. Another time.

Darn you, ADD.

If you would like to financially support Katie's (aka La Petite Belle) journey to healing, you can find more information here: www.gofundme.com/Katieg.  All funds go to cover medical bills and expenses.

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