Thursday, May 7, 2009

What makes a good mom anyway?

You know, we always feel like failures as moms. Or maybe it's just me.

The constant fussing and nagging.

The wanting to be alone.

The fast-food or cereal dinners.

The underwear-less drawers.

The punishing.

The having to teach responsibility and consequences.

The giving them too much sugar.

The wishing you read and sang to the second one just as much as the first.

The scrapbooks that sit waiting to be finished.

The not being cool and so out of touch with what's in.

The always being exhausted.

The wishing they would always be open and honest with us.

The fear.

And all the guilt that ensues because of these.

It's makes us just want to give up. It's a whole lot easier to just let them do what they want, isn't it? No fussing or punishments or hard stuff and the like.

Well, that's exactly what we should do.

Just give up.

Not in the way you're thinking.

Just give it up to God. They're His to begin with.

I'm tired of stressing about what kind of parenting job I'm doing when really it should be so simple.

You know the Scripture ...

"Teach a child in the way he should go and when he grows old he will not depart form it." Proverbs 22:6

That's all we can do. Teach them. Pray for them. Love them.

And, NEWS FLASH ... we will never be perfect moms, no matter how hard we try.

The best things we can give our kids is allowing them to see our humanness. When we allow ourselves to not be perfect, they know it's OK to not be perfect.

I pray for opportunities to speak into my girls' lives. Open windows to their souls. Tender moments alone. Treasured conversations.

Those are the things I long for.

I'll take those any day before perfection.

I'm OK with my girls going one day without underwear if you're OK with it. (Please tell me you know me well enough to know that I would never do such a horrendous thing. That would be a horrible-mother thing to do. See ... still not OK with it.)

Oh ... Happy Mother's Day. (That's what this post started out as ... a tribute, but turned into a slap-in-the-face. Oops.)


Julie @ blessedwithfive said...

I really appreciate this post. Some days my kids make me feel like I am the BAD one by the way they look at me when I have to correct them. My Mom tells me I am getting payback for the naughties I did as a child. I often wonder - how naughty was I? I really don't think I could have been THAT bad . . . or . . . I probably would have never been able to sit down. (if you know what I mean) I do believe this pay back thing has been accomplished many times over through my children.

You are totally right - the Bible tells us exactly what to do.

The underwear thing is funny!

Wendi @ Every Day Miracles said...

Giving up - so, SO hard. So, SO important. Giving it to God. He's so way more capable than us, but really?? That control thing is a toughie for me... :) Great post.

Sara@i.Sass said...

Well happy Mother's day to you too! ;)

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3 John 4.

2Thinks said...

I know a teenage son who went many months sans underwear. The mother found out when she realized his skivvys were no longer showing up in the laundry basket. Imagine her horror.

And WHAT kind of a mother must she have been to raise such a risk taking fellow?

I'll never tell.

Debra said...

Love this post! I know I'm not a perfect mother and I've made a lot of mistakes, but one thing I know is that, my kids can never say, that I didn't listen and take time to talk with them. I treasure our conversations and tender moments alone, where I just listen and not judge or reprimand.

The underwear thing...i can relate to....there have been times that I've washed them by hand in the sink and blow dried them or threw them in the dryer. hahaha, the things we do for our kids! :)

TCKK said...

Great Post!

Lois Lane II said...

Happy early Mother's Day to you, Supermom. =)

Sarah said...

I love this post! The mommy guilt always gets the best of me. This post is something I need to read over and over again.:)

Beth T. said...

This post has put an end to my lurking! Thanks for your insight and honesty about motherhood. It's what I appreciate most in friends. Beth

Brandi said...

Gotta love when a tribute turns into a slap in the face! That's my kind of post!

This was a great reminder for me. . thanks.