Without relationships, you got nothin'!

I've been seeing this truth revealed in my life a lot lately.

Everything in our lives is all about relationships ... either the presence of them or the lack of them.

The "lack of" is the sad part. The "presence of" is the awesome part.

With relationships come so much fulfillment in every area of our lives. Without relationships, there are always missing pieces.

People do most things in their lives out of relationship with other people. One person will sacrifice themselves for or give of themselves to a person that they have a relationship with, but will not for someone they don't know.

Now I realize there are exceptions ... like how we give to causes and sponsor children. But, we only do this because the cause has been presented to us; we know the story and have compassion. In that way, we are connected through relationship. And, we are only influenced in this because of the relationships we have or have had in our own lives. Relationships help to make us who we are.

Of course, our most important relationship is the one we have with our Heavenly Father. The extent of our relationship with Him affects our lives negatively or positively. God grants favor to His children and blesses those who love Him and are close to Him.

The same goes with another important relationship ... the one we develop with our parents. This relationship molds a lot of who we are as human beings. Again, the relationship can be negative or positive, and, in turn, ends up affecting our relationships in the future.

Then there's all the other relationships ... siblings, extended family, friends, colleagues.

I've really discovered that this saying rings true: "It's not what you know; it's who you know."

Good relationships can bring lots of favor and blessings into your life. But, bad relationships can bring lots of trouble and pain into your life.

Cultivating relationships has to become a priority for us as Christians.

We HAVE to pursue relationships. It's our calling.

Is it always easy? No.

We don't have time. We don't want to open up ourselves to one more person. We have enough people in our lives. How in the world can we add more?

I don't know how; I just know we have to.

It requires us stepping out of our comfortable bubble and not just making ourselves available to others, but pursuing relationships with them. Of course, we need to pursue the right relationships. We should pursue relationships with people that we know will be a godly influence in our lives. We should pursue relationships with people whom we think need us to be a godly influence in their lives.

If you're not open to new relationships, you're missing out on so much!

The Roomie

I've had lots of different roommates from my college years to those years before I was married.

All my experiences have been positive. I never had a roommate that I had trouble living with, which is why I think being newly married was not that huge of an adjustment for me. It's probably because I'm so easygoing and flexible. {wink}

It's so funny that I would have such an easy time living with other people seeing as I am an only child. You would think it would be quite the opposite. It must be the deep longing for siblings that I always had. Who knows.

But, our little family has a roommate.

We will call her Laurie Belle because we consider her a part of our family now that she's here.

(She's on Medifast as you can see.)

Laurie Belle is staying with us for the summer. She's an incredible friend to me and we have made a pact to still be great friends once the summer's over. People have said things like "are you sure you guys will still be friends after this?" or "are you guys gonna be able to live with each other?" To which we both respond with laughter. Duh. Of course we will. We're friends and being friends goes way deeper than any type of disagreement we might have. Just because two people have strong personalities doesn't mean they can't live together. I know many couples who each have strong personalities and their marriages are successful ... HELLO ... Beau and I are one of them.

The idea that people who are similar and have similar personalities and demeanors can't live together or be together is absurd. Beau and I do have differences, but lots of similarities.

Laurie Belle's first weekend here = Success!

I love how my family was so willing to welcome her in as one of us without any hesitation. It showed me how good their hearts really are.

Laurie Belle ... it's gonna be a great summer, not just for us, but for you too!

Dinner Time

We eat as a family at the table most nights.

Now, there are those nights that not all family members are home, but we make EVERY effort to come together as many nights as we can.

Although there are also those days that I want nothing more than a plate of food on my lap while I watch an episode of "Parenthood." Yessiree Bob!

Beau hates that. HATES.

He MUST always eat at a table. Always. I've never seen him not eat at a table. It's a prerequisite for his meals. He's so fancy.

Coming together every night as a family to eat a meal inspires so many thoughts and conversations. It's a time to connect and share about our day and the days to come.

There are many moments of laughter and even moments of tears that have occurred at the table. The laughter I enjoy. The tears over eating vegetables or due to sassy mouths I do not. There are even moments of 20 questions, mostly by La Petite Belle. She's quite inquisitive, sometimes to a fault. She says she's "just curious." There are all kinds of conversations that go on here.

Last night, Beau made this statement to La Petite Belle in reference to pulling up her math grade:

"The odds are stacked against you."

So sad. But true.

{I need you all to band together and pray with me for a math miracle!}

To which La Petite Belle replied:

"But, Daddy, what about the evens?"

She just doesn't get it sometimes. But, boy, does she bring joy to our table.

An Entire Post on Nutella and a Bit of Mommy Wisdom

There is a love in our house.

It is the pure deliciousness of Nutella ... a creamy hazelnut spread created with roasted hazelnuts, milk, and the best part, cocoa.

If you haven't tried it, you are missing out!

In fact, when there is a jar in the house, dissension occurs between the children. This involves arguing over "who ate ALL the Nutella" and measuring the depth of the Nutella left in the jar, which then involves the discussion of who ate more and who gets the last bit.

Totally. Annoying.

The elder child even resorted to hiding the last bit of Nutella at the top of the pantry behind the sugar and flour. Little did she know, that the younger one would discover it anyway.

All this bickering caused me to put the Equal Distribution Policy in place. This same policy has been put in place for Pepperidge Farm Goldfish.

One Nutella jar, divided into thirds and labeled ... that's how this works.

Now no questions or bickering. Everyone knows how much they have and can make preparations accordingly.

Now back to the awesomeness of Nutella ...

My favorite way to eat it is right off the spoon. Second favorite ... spread on a warm piece of toast.

Hoping my third favorite will be one of these that I've pinned, hoping to one day actually make them. Pictures with recipe links included. You're welcome.

Nutella Gooey Butter Cake

Nutella Cream Cheese Turnovers

Nutella Strawberry Tart

Chewy Nutella Peanut Butter Chip Cookies

Nutella Stuffed Custard French Toast

OK. That's enough. I could literally post at least a dozen of these, but I'm gonna have to go get a scoop of Nutella now. 

Idiosyncrasies

You have them. I have them.

Idiosyncrasies fascinate me. They're fun and I love when I discover the reason behind someone else's.

Remember? There was that fear of biscuit cans that I've since overcome! I always wondered why for thirty-some-odd years, I was so scared of exploding dough. Then my mother, very matter-of-factly, told me that I had a can explode on me as a child. DING, DING, DING! Everything fell into place and made sense at that moment. I face this fear head-on when the opportunity presents itself.

In fact, I have quite a few idiosyncrasies. Allow me to share. I'll limit my examples to five. 

My husband, I'm sure, could think of many more.

BANANAS: I don't like them. I can force myself to eat a few bites, but despite my best efforts, that's all I can eat. However, I LOVE bananas and peanut butter. LOVE! I eat that almost every morning. Add a swirl of honey and ... delish! I also like banana bread, banana muffins, bananas in smoothies, or banana cake. LOVE! But, plain ol' bananas ... gross.

SANDWICHES: People may thing the way I eat my sandwiches are weird. I eat the outside, crust first, working my way to the center. I get that little habit from my mother who always said the center was the best part! Save it for last!

THE FOOT RUB: I have a habit, which Beau isn't particularly fond of. I rub one of my feet, preferably the left one, back and forth, back and forth, in order to fall asleep. It's not a conscious thing. I just do it. I'm pretty sure it's a comforting thing from all those years of being rocked to sleep.

VICK'S: If you've been here long enough, you know about my love for Vick's VapoRub. It's my drug of choice. I have used it on my lips every night for the past 25 years or so despite the warning to discontinue use after seven days. I must have it to fall asleep at night. Another thing Beau doesn't care for. The smell is like pure heaven to me. He can't stand it.

THE COCOON: I also like to cocoon myself on one side of my body, using the covers on the bed, specifically the leg on the outside of the bed. That combined with the foot rub and VapoRub makes me an interesting bedfellow. Probably from all those years of being an only child and never having to sleep with anyone ever ... ah ... the good 'ol days. I kid. I actually can't sleep well at all without Beau and I'm not even mentioning the noise machine I have to have. Geez. Talk about a high-maintenance sleeper!

I can't be the only one with such idiosyncrasies or odd habits.

You know you have them. Think about it. It'll make you giggle.

Thoughts on Grace

Grace.

It's such an eloquent word. Just the mention of it causes me to breathe easier.

When I hear the word, I think of second chances and freedom.

I'm thankful for God's grace and have been meditating on what it truly means to walk daily in God's grace.

Grace is simply this: God's unmerited favor.

Three words with so much meaning.

We don't deserve the favor, but He gives it to us anyway. We can't earn the favor, yet He still extends it to us anyway.

Even further ... Grace is not only God's unmerited favor, but, the exemption of God's punishment.

Grace is our way of escape from the consequences we deserve. As sinners, we deserve God's wrath, but get His love instead ... even more ... His favor. Wow!

I can't say that I could ever offer someone else the same grace that is extended to me every day. My flesh screams for justice! I tend to want people to get what they deserve, yet want grace for myself. Wow. What a wretch am I!

It's easy to see how God's love for us is immeasurable and how our version of love does not compare to His. We just don't love people the way He does and we won't no matter how hard we try.

God's grace can go so far as to allow us to not receive the consequences of our own choices, our own actions. Amazing. Grace can actually turn our consequences around into something good instead.

That's not to say, as Christians, we don't suffer consequences. Believe me. I speak from experience. We do. You must always be prepared for whatever consequences you deserve for the actions you make. But, there are times in our lives that God gives us a pass. He really does. That's one of those God-moments where you recognize His goodness and see His hand in your life.

There are times I see that I really should have suffered or been punished for something I've done, but God extends grace to me ... grace I don't deserve.

However, there are also times that consequences just come. Consequences just so happen to work that way. That's when God grants us the grace to walk through the consequence to see what's on the other side ... usually something pretty awesome like wisdom or strength or peace.

Nevertheless, His grace is always there. It can't be hidden and it's something we are extended every day.

I like this definition of grace the best:  

"the free and benevolent influence of a holy God operating sovereignly in the lives of undeserving sinners."

Operating! That means it's something He's managing every day.

Grace by no means frees us from living a life of righteousness.  God still calls us to live blameless lives. But grace is there to catch us when we do fall.

We should never cheapen God's grace by ignoring His Word and thinking we can just keep coming back and begging for forgiveness. We cheapen it when we make empty promises to God over and over again with no intent to truly commit to Him or truly follow & obey Him. The grace we've received was bought with a very high price. Let's not take it for granted.

I absolutely love the lyrics of Amy Grant's new song, "Don't Try So Hard." So much truth about grace.

Thank you, God, for the grace you freely grant me every single day.

Always the bride ... Never the bridesmaid ...

Wait ... what?

Yes. Weird, huh?

I have been a bride. Only once. (but engaged & "promised" twice before so ... I know ... crazy.)

I have never been a bridesmaid. Never. Not once.

I came close a couple of times but no dice. There was always a sister or cousin or 2nd-grade friend that trumped me and got the job. I'm not bitter about it. Not at all.

Now, that I think about it, those girls quite possibly lost out on the greatest bridesmaid EVER! I know I would've been hard-working and perfect for the job!

In fact, for my own wedding nineteen years ago, I scrambled for bridesmaids. SCRAMBLED. And, I only had four. (sorry, girls that may read this that were in my wedding ... you were all great!)

I just never had a lot of girlfriends. I had one or two girls that I considered good friends throughout most of my life. But, I always tended to pull back at some point. I had trust issues.

I hate that I missed out on some potentially great friendships and relationships due to walls I put up and the idea that I didn't need any girlfriends. In fact, I didn't need anyone.

I realize now that girlfriends are essential to life. I feel very blessed with the generous amount of good friendships that I do have now. Very. Blessed.

Girlfriends play a part in our lives that no husband or boyfriend can play. It's just a different and special kind of relationship. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about (unless you are like me 20 years ago, then you have no clue).

I say all this to say that I appointed myself an honorary bridesmaid this weekend at my friend, Jeri's wedding. Yep. I'm bossy like that. I had SO much fun! My friend, Jane, joined me and declared herself honorary bridesmaid as well. Although, she has been a bridesmaid, so it obviously wasn't as special as it was for me.

We were at the bride's disposal. Her wish was our command.

Lunch delivered. YES! Just one of the simple tasks completed.

I even offered to hold her dress while she peed. True friendship! See? Told you! FANTASTIC bridesmaid!

But, the best part of being an honorary bridesmaid was getting to witness the beauty of this lovely lady marry one amazing guy! I pray God blesses them with many years filled with love, laughter, and happiness.

I love you, Jeri! I treasure your friendship! 

(And since everyone thinks we're sisters, I've decided to appoint you my honorary sister.)